I saw him today.

I saw him today.

He walked by like he didn’t know me, like I was some common stranger.  How can he do that?  How can he dismiss me from his life so completely? How can he turn off his feelings for me?  Someone tell me, I need to know.  What is it about me that makes me so undeserving of his love?

I was deserving of it the other night.  He wanted me then, caressing my body, whispering in my ear.  I was plenty good enough then.

I gave him the power.  I gave it to him willingly too.  Gave him the power to smash my heart and he used it.  Used it as a lethal weapon and I stand here watching my guts fall to the carpet.

Why him?  Why me?

His words covered me in honey. His eyes were soothing pools in which to drift.  His body, an anchor to keep me from floating away.

I lose my eyes to lose myself in the memories.  His scent still lingers in my bed, filling my nostrils with blessed memories of when I was his.

Ho w do I live through this?  How do I want to?  How do I walk away?

I don’t.

There is only one way for the pain to end.

I saw him today.

He should have looked my way.  He should have opened his eyes.

I need him here now.  I need his arms around me, telling me things will be okay.  Doesn’t he know I can’t do this with out him?

I saw him today.

He walked by and I turned to follow.

The look in his eyes when he realized it was me.  He never knew I had it in me.

Now he knows.  Now he understands.

I saw him today.

I don’t think I’ll be seeing him again.

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